I was thinking about what to write today and while checking my OkCupid app inspiration suddenly struck. I've talked about the things I've been going through with my illness as of recently and how I deal with it on a daily basis. Something I haven't touched on yet is how it can mold and shape relationships of a romantic nature.
Dealing with Crohn's just day-to-day is hard and messy and frustrating all on it's own. I've found it very difficult to just maintain friendships let alone any kind of romance. In the beginning of any kind of relationship I usually try to hide the fact that I'm sick. It seems like it would be easy considering on the outside I look like every other normal,healthy and functioning person. This plan works alright until you have to start explaining why you need to use the bathroom more than 3 times for possibly 5 mins each time in one hangout session. Or when you have to constantly explain why you can't eat popcorn or any kind of nuts and no it's not because of a nut allergy. The jig is usually up when I have to tell people I can't hang out because I'm in Boston at the hospital for a few days or that I'm having my 3rd colonoscopy for the year. And this is already super hard with people who are supposed to be your friends. I'm not saying everyone I know is insensitive or doesn't accept me but there are definitely some who I think really haven't grasped the severity of my situation. Now in saying that I do have to mention that I also have a few people in my life who have gone above and beyond for me,bringing me to treatments and doctor's appointments and for that I've always been grateful. Trying to just maintain a social life is already challenging enough and now try to add in dating someone and having to go through the whole process of explaining everything you're experiencing is exhausting. Not to mention scary because that person essentially has be accepting that I or anyone who is disabled has limitations physically and sometimes emotionally too. What's the etiquette of bringing up that you have a disability anyway? "Thanks for dinner, I had fun and by the way I have no large intestine." I'm not saying it's impossible to find this person but it will be tiring and sometimes I wonder if it's worth it. I obviously know that relationships are hard work even between healthy people and that the only way to find this person is going to be by looking. I don't think he's going to fall out of the sky one day but I'll admit I'd prefer it since it'd be so much easier. If anyone has any experiences or insights on this please let me know in the comments below! My final thoughts are that if I find that person that would be great. And if I don't I'm honestly not too worried about it. Heartbreak sucks anyway but that's another story. Currently watching: Jurassic Park Tonight's picture: I think it's clear that I'm just too picky. Even if nothing ever comes of using this app I will say that I got some pretty amusing messages out of it.
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AuthorA closer to 30 than 25 female living with chronic illness. I've got an obsessive love for cats, Disney, video games and cats. My name is Alissa. Archives
August 2016
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